Bottom of the Third

There are only 5 days remaining in my third year of medical school. I don’t know where the time has gone. While preparing for my final exam in pediatrics, I’ve also been a bit overwhelmed by the responsibilities that lie ahead. My fourth year schedule is a bit up in the air right now as I shuffle various electives to try to solidify the “strategy” behind my schedule. I find that there are not enough months in the fourth year to do all of the electives that I want to do. Fourth year is generally seen as a fun and relatively relaxed year (especially the second half when residency applications are submitted and interviews are over). However, as I look ahead, I know that this upcoming year is the last year where I will not be responsible for patient care. I have been providing patient care all year, but not nearly as independently as I will during my intern year. It’s scary to think of that. Also, I continue to struggle with my residency choices. I am sure that I love surgery, but not sure that I am willing to give up the other components in my life to the degree that will likely to necessary. I don’t know where I belong. I want to look back on my choice and say that it was correct, that I would do it all over again. I want to lead a happy, fulfilling life. I don’t want my life to be my work. I want work to be a rewarding part of my life. This is an ongoing conflict in my head. I’m trying to work it out. I’m trying to become centered in myself and in the world around me. I’m doing yoga. I’ve made a serious decision to commit to daily meditation. I’m hoping that these efforts will help me find my path.

Recent Events:

On Friday, I presented my first academic poster. It was on a survey study that my friend and I conducted on healthcare worker decision-making styles (medical students, residents, fellows, attending doctors, nurses, social workers, and Ph.D.s). It went very well and we’re looking forward to writing our manuscript. I think that we have an excellent chance of getting published – which would be awesome. It is so rewarding when work pays off.

Upcoming:

Starting next Thursday, I will be taking my first guitar class at the Old Town School of Folk Music. I essentially taught myself guitar (with the help of a few friends), and I’ve stagnated in my progress. I’m hoping to pick up some new skills and meet some new people. I’m always looking to hang out with non-medical people.

In one week (during my medical school vacation), I have a three day long intensive ethics consultation course. The course actually lasts several weeks, but most of it is online. I’m really looking forward to practicing my consultation skills. I haven’t lead a consultation since before medical school. I’m also excited to hear how other people have been trained – what works for them, what has been troublesome, effective, etc. I think that there are so many ways to do it well and I’m happy to have the opportunity to see more than my limited viewpoint.

Medical Specialty Aptitude Test

This morning I took the Medical Specialty Aptitude Test from Virginia University Medical School. It’s a 130 question test that helps guide you in terms of which specialties might best fit you. It’s open to anyone, so if you are just curious what kind of a doctor you might be if you followed that path, give it a try.

I am actually quite impressed with how close it is to specialties I am currently considering: general surgery and anesthesia (both of which came out in my top 7). Colorectal surgery is a fellowship after general surgery, so those really don’t sit independently. Nuclear medicine is a fellowship after Radiology. Urology is a surgical subspecialty. Dermatology is its own subspecialty, which precludes the need for a 3 year internal medicine residency.

Also impressive is that the bottom choices are also what I consider to be my bottom choices through personal reflection. Psychiatry, neurology, internal medicine and family medicine are all important fields, but I do not fit into them at all.

I am amused by the fact that aerospace medicine (whatever that is) lies so low on the list considering that I am married to an aerospace engineer.

Rank	Specialty	Score
1	colon & rectal surgery	47
2	nuclear med	46
3	urology	45
4	general surgery	45
5	dermatology	44
6	radiation oncology	44
7	anesthesiology	43
8	emergency med	43
9	nephrology	43
10	pathology	43
11	occupational med	42
12	radiology	41
13	thoracic surgery	41
14	obstetrics/gynecology	41
15	gastroenterology	41
16	hematology	40
17	ophthalmology	40
18	plastic surgery	40
19	otolaryngology	39
20	orthopaedic surgery	39
21	pulmonology	39
22	infectious disease	39
23	med oncology	38
24	neurosurgery	37
25	rheumatology	37
26	cardiology	37
27	allergy & immunology	36
28	endocrinology	36
29	preventive med	36
30	pediatrics	36
31	aerospace med	35
32	psychiatry	34
33	neurology	34
34	physical med & rehabilitation	30
35	general internal med	30
36	family practice	29

Authentic Happiness Survey

Fiber Fiend blogged about the Authentic Happiness website and I thought I would check it out.

Being on my psychiatry rotation makes me even more interested in this type of questionnaire.  I have noticed that working during this clerkship has effected my mood. It seems like a good idea to check in with my core self periodically.

Here are my results for the VIA Signature Strengths Survey

Your Top Strength

Curiosity and interest in the world
You are curious about everything. You are always asking questions, and you find all subjects and topics fascinating. You like exploration and discovery.

Your Second Strength

Honesty, authenticity, and genuineness
You are an honest person, not only by speaking the truth but by living your life in a genuine and authentic way. You are down to earth and without pretense; you are a “real” person.

Your Third Strength

Judgment, critical thinking, and open-mindedness
Thinking things through and examining them from all sides are important aspects of who you are. You do not jump to conclusions, and you rely only on solid evidence to make your decisions. You are able to change your mind.

Your Fourth Strength

Bravery and valor
You are a courageous person who does not shrink from threat, challenge, difficulty, or pain. You speak up for what is right even if there is opposition. You act on your convictions.

Your Fifth Strength

Fairness, equity, and justice
Treating all people fairly is one of your abiding principles. You do not let your personal feelings bias your decisions about other people. You give everyone a chance.